Ever have that incredible dream that’s super awesome and you immediately realize that you need to tell others about it? You know. How all this CRAZY stuff happened and other people just need to hear about it? Well. I understand. But, I do have a couple rules to keep in mind when you’re slogging through it trying to remember stuff as you’re telling me.
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Sweet Dreams
The Departed: Ruining Cranberry Juice
I enjoyed the movie The Departed. I liked it when Leonardo’s character ordered a cranberry juice. I thought it was funny when that asshole said, “whaddaya got, yer period?” And I liked it when Leo bashed his face in with that glass. What I don’t like is that now whenever I go to a bar and get cranberry juice, 50 people ask me if I’m on my period.
Yes. I know you like The Hangover.
Ever heard of a little movie called The Hangover? It’s literally the funniest movie ever made in the history of movies. How do I know that? Every single person on Earth says so via Facebook, Twitter, Google Buzz, Friendster, Yammer, MySpace or any other of these bastard programs.
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Funniest thing ever to say ever: What Are You Smoking?
“Man, are you smoking crack or something?” HAHAHAHHAHAHA. This is probably the single funniest comeback ever uttered by mankind. Literally, it’s so funny that every person uses it at least once in their life. It’s so awesome that teachers use it and AUTOMATICALLY seem cool to their kids.
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